TED* and Family Conversations
Lately we have heard stories of how families are exploring together the TED* (*The Empowerment Dynamic)® book to prompt authentic and powerful conversations at home. Since the book is written in a fable format and easy to read, the lifelong lessons of learning to be a Creator are also available to younger folks.
The TED* roles give adults and children, alike, a way to embrace their best self. This week we are excited to share the notes from one of our team members who is reading the Power of TED* to her 7 and 9 year old children as part of their home schooling during the pandemic. Here is a summary of the notes she sent to us:
I read the first chapter of The Power of TED* to my two kids, ages 7 & 9. They have quite a bit of drama in their lives, including having lived through divorce.
I switched careers to be a work-from-home (step)mom. These two children are my life and need some positive reinforcements and stability in their lives. Mine and my husband’s marriage has been rock-solid and has given the kids a glimpse of how marriage should be. Respectful, fun, positive, stable, loving.
The way that TED* is written is perfect for all ages. The storytelling aspect of such a profound framework allows the children to grasp these life-changing ideas.
I asked my kids part-way through chapter 1 to give me an example of when they felt like a Victim. I wanted to respect their privacy, so I will not divulge the many, many examples I was given. Needless to say, they could relate to the Victim role.
I read on to finish the chapter and ended with Creator as the opposite of Victim. I asked them to reflect on the first chapter.
Later in the evening my son randomly shared challenges he had with his sister – especially when not at home with us. We talked through the situation with him and his older sister.
I then asked them to come up with a code word they would use only between themselves when disrespect (drama) arises. They decided on Mew (a Pokémon character). This word was to be used only when the other person was not being respectful of the other. This word would remind them to be courteous and respectful to each other, therefore (ideally) allowing them to reset and not fall into the Dreaded Drama Triangle (DDT).
About a week later I read more chapters to them. We talked about our emotions and how focusing on an ocean (as described in the book) can help them feel calm and try to be still inside and enjoy the moment. The kids picked up on it surprisingly fast.
Today we finished chapter 4 and 5. I know you are not supposed to call someone a Victim. However, that is exactly what I did to show an example of when my son says, “I can’t do it” and huffs and puffs and throws a mini fit. This usually triggers me, and I send him to his room.
I got a huge “aha” and realized I looked to my Rescuer of silence! I am glad I am keeping my journal about homeschooling with TED*!
We’re in chapter 5 and it ended with a cliffhanger and the kids are excited to hear that there is a “good” triangle to counter the “bad.”
Thank you for this work. Kids get it so fast!
Last week we shared a video of how 10 year-old Gabby read the book and her insights. Here is the second video of that conversation. This time Gabby and her mother, Roselyn, talk together about how to apply TED* with friends and at home.
Thanks, again, to Gabby and Roselyn for agreeing to be interviewed!